The Ancestral Model for Modern Parenting
Howdy everyone! I’ll start by announcing my new article: Act Like Your Kids Are Watching: An Ancestral Model for Modern Parenting.
ONE FROM THE AGES
Marcus Aurelius on how we can always find a lesson in every situation.
“No role is so well suited to philosophy as the one you happen to be in right now.”
ONE FROM TODAY
Brené Brown on setting an intrinsic example for your kids:
“Who we are and how we engage with the world are much stronger predictors of how our children will do than what we know about parenting. In terms of teaching our children to dare greatly in the "never enough" culture, the question isn't so much ‘Are you parenting the right way?’ as it is: ‘Are you the adult that you want your child to grow up to be?’"
Source: Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead
ONE FROM US
It’s cute when your kids begin to reflect your mannerisms back at you. It’s much less cute when they develop your temper, impatience, and bad habits. Brené Brown captures, with perfect eloquence, a truth that most of us already feel: leadership, education, and (especially) parenting benefit more from example than instruction.
We can interpret this as a weighty responsibility - how can I possibly live up to the example that I want my kids to become? Or we can see it as motivation. Demonstrating awesome adulthood for your kids also helps you to continually grow. You don’t have to be perfect. Just be kind, admit and discuss your mistakes, and let your kids see you striving to learn and improve. It’s less about your precise words and actions than it is about your self-image and disposition toward the world.
This intrinsic modeling is a piece of my new article. The best takeaways, though, are much more practical. It’s a system to help you craft a lifestyle that will meet your needs and your kids’ needs better than ever, even during the current lockdown. Rather than simply bearing this time until we can finally return to “normal,” we can build patterns around activities that meet many needs at once.
This might sound like multitasking, but it’s not. When we attempt to do several things at once, we are in a constant mental state of transition. Trying to multitask is really no-tasking—flitting from task to task, never developing deep focus.
I’m talking about “stacking,” which is more like multi-needing or multi-purposing. Stacking helps you meet many needs at once and set a better intrinsic example for your kids. You can work from home and help your kids navigate their new home-schooling routine. You can learn new skills, stay active, bond with your family, and a lot more. This might seem too good to be true, but it’s actually a very natural process. Our earliest human ancestors were the best stackers, and their lifestyles offer an example of how to better structure our modern lives.
My article today offers a much deeper discussion of intrinsic teaching and stacking. I’ve also included a list of stacked activities that you and your family can try during our current lockdown (although they are great anytime as well). Enjoy!
Act Like Your Kids Are Watching: An Ancestral Model for Modern Parenting
Thanks for being with me today and remember, life is too short to be normal!